Turning sorrow into soil + violence into vegetables

I awoke in such a strange world today. One that seems to have lost its way. My heart hurts and I’m trapped in a limbo between tears, confusion, disbelief and rage. I see so much around me that I do not understand. People hurting each other, violence and over consumption, conflict where there should be community, the planet we live on getting covered in chemicals and its people getting poisoned by food they are told is perfectly safe.

Every morning I wake up and walk barefoot out into my garden, just steps from where I sleep outside every night under the stars. I walk and meditate, touch my tomatoes, listen to the sounds of nature all around me. I hash over whatever I saw in my newsfeed the day before–try to find the right ways to let go of what I saw. Let go of what place got flooded and devastated, of what night club got filled with gunfire, of what forest got burned or cut down, of who is running for president, of the oceans becoming landfills, of the people I care about eating genetically modified food and being told it is totally safe, of what person got killed over their skin color or who they choose to love on. The violence, it’s the worst for me to bear–what we’ve come to do to one another and why. Some mornings I can breathe my way through it pretty well and get back to growing vegetables. Other days, like today, I just sit out there and weep for the pain of the planet and all its critters, us included…. then I get back to growing vegetables. Which brings me to my point, a suggestion of how we could take a step onto a different path.

You know what I can’t see folks getting violent over? Growing vegetables. It’s hard to bicker over beans…. so does that mean we could find peace with one another over peas? Could communities come together and turn our pain into produce? Our sorrow into soil? What if we protested with permaculture? By reconnecting to nature, the wild things and with each other? Can you imagine? What could be if we all come together and realize… we have to start moving through the world in a different way than we have been…

…and I feel like we have to do it right now.

I don’t think it’s too late. It can’t be too late to try. To try to be a step in succession that leads to something more positive than where the road we are on now does. To be willing to do the work to find the small and slow solutions to get us there.

Who knows, I’m quite sure I don’t have all the answers–I just have the one for me… and that’s to garden. to forage for wild things. to stay unplugged so that  i can listen to the earth under my feet and connect to it. to find my tribe of like-minded folks and make sure they have vegetables too.

These times, they feel crazy and uncertain. I feel like all I can do is decide how I can best move through them. And for me, that’s barefoot and in my garden more often than not. Turning my sorrow and grief for the planet and its creatures into soil and healthy food I can share.



Everyone tells me how great it is that I lost all this weight gardening, but that what’s even better is what it does for my mental state! Think it’s too late to start a garden this year because you haven’t had one before? It’s not! In mid-July you can still plant: beans, broccoli, carrots, corn, cucumbers, and kale!